Sometimes I’m not that strong black women…

It’s true, as much as some may believe it, as much as people tell me and I try to tell myself at times, sometimes, that’s just not who I am. I was inspired to share my story after reading The New Face of Depression: The “Strong” Black Women on blackdoctor.org.

These past couple of weeks has been one of those times. It started with a break-up in mid-March, which I was fine with for about a month, but then things begin to spiral. No, I wasn’t all depressed and sad over him, we’re not going to give him that much credit, but I was sad, depressed and full of anxiety. And to say “was” is maybe going too far. 

My therapist, yes, I’m in therapy, I’ve been seeing her since the end of 2016, recommended that I go on anxiety and anti-depressant meds. So yep, I’m on medication. I was diagnosed with moderate depression. She recommended that I take a couple of days off to just be, and I took her advice and ran with it. I took an entire week off.  And back to the therapist really quickly, not only am I seeing her twice a month, I also attend a women’s group once a week. So there I’ve dispelled all the myths of a strong black women. I see a therapist, go to an additional women’s support group and I’m on meds. 

Next blog post, I’ll share what brought on this wave of emotion after a month of being single. Again, it wasn’t all about him. Until then, just be free….

P.S. As I write this I can’t believe that I’m allowing myself to be this open to scrutiny. Vulnerability isn’t one of my strong suits, but, I gotta heal, and maybe, I’ll help someone else along the way. So here goes… 

Introducing JustFree

My journey to being “justfree” begin in October of 2016, close to the 10 year anniversary of my moms death, now what I like to refer to as her transtion because nothing really dies, we just move on. But more about that later. Oddly enough, my “mama,” as me and my siblings called her, began calling her own self “free” probably one to two years prior to the end of her earthly journey. Little did I know that I would pick it up 10 plus years later, with my own little twist.

What does it mean to be “justfree?” Honesly I’m still finding out. But what I can say is that spiritual freedom is at my core. That’s where it started for me. I know that is also the journey my mama was on up until the time of her transition and I believe that it still continues on today. There’s a quote that reads, “we are not human beings having a spiritual experience; we are spiritual beings having a human experience.” Until next time, just be free…..